How the Love Doctor Finally Met Her Match             I first met Helen Fisher at a conference where we were both speaking about sex, love, and relationships. My book Looking for Love in All the Wrong Places: Overcoming Romantic and Sexual Addictions had just been published and her book, Anatomy of Love: A Natural History […]

Having written a book about the 5 Stages of Love and an article, “The 5 Love Secrets Your Therapist Never Told You About,” I was excited when a colleague told me about a new book coming out called The Go-Giver Marriage: A Little Story About the 5 Secrets to Lasting Love by John David Mann […]

We’ve all had the experience of falling in love with someone who turns out to be absolutely the wrong choice. Many of us have done it more than once. At MenAlive, you can hear me share my confessions of a twice-divorced marriage counselor.  Why do we make seemingly crazy mistakes in our love lives and […]

My wife, Carlin, and I have been married for 42 years. It is the third marriage for both of us. When we fell in love and I had decided that she’s the one, I comforted myself believing that “third time’s the charm.” But we were realistic adults and we had understandable anxieties about commitment. We […]

Part 2             In Part 1 we examined the roots of men’s fear of women and how it often triggers male anger. Because the underlying causes of these feelings are most often unconscious, they continue to be a problem for men as well as the women they love. Truly, the truth can set us free […]

Part 1             I’ve been a marriage and family counselor for more than fifty years. It is true, we teach what we want to learn. At my website, MenAlive.com, I greet visitors with a short welcome video, “Confessions of a Twice-Divorced Marriage Counselor.” I talk about what went wrong in my first two marriages and […]

In my recent article, “My Moon Shot Mission to Save Man Kind,” I quoted my colleague Randolph M. Nesse, M.D. who said, “If you could make male mortality rates the same as female rates, you would do more good than curing cancer.”  Some may be surprised by the statement, but for me and many men […]

I’ve been short all my life. From the time I started school I was the shortest boy in my class. My mother told me not to worry. “Your uncles are tall, I’m sure you’ll grow to be tall like them” Both she and my father were under 5 ½ feet tall and even in college […]

I was five years old when my uncle drove me to the mental hospital. I was confused and afraid. “Why do I have to go?” I asked Uncle Harry. He looked at me with his round face and kind eyes. “Your father needs you,” he said simply. “What’s the matter with him?” He turned away […]

            Being male for nearly 78 years, I’ve had a long time to think about what it means to have an XY pair of chromosomes and how I am alike and different from those who have an XX pair. I founded MenAlive following the birth of our first son, Jemal, on November 21, 1969. I […]

Millions of men are depressed and don’t know it. Millions of women are living with depressed men, but don’t know what to do. Men often take their irritability and anger out on the women and children they care most about and feel guilty, ashamed, and frustrated. Families live in confusion and pain because they don’t […]

Like most men, I was trained from an early age to be self-sufficient and strong. Part of that training is the reason men as a group live sicker and die sooner than women. For more than fifty years now it has been my mission to change this unhealthy paradigm. It is true for men and […]

Part 3 – The Happy Truth Tellers             In Part 1, I shared my joy and the birth of my first child in 1969 and the fears that I faced when I read the book Future Shock by Alvin Toffler the following year and later had my own vision where I saw the Ship of […]

            I was five years old when my uncle drove me to the mental hospital. I was confused and afraid.             “Why do I have to go?” I asked Uncle Harry.             He turned his head towards me and smiled. “Your father needs you.”             “What’s the matter with him?” I was beginning to cry, […]

Image by Matheus Ferrero “Today, many things indicate that we are going through a transitional period, when it seems that something is on the way out and something else painfully being born,” said the playwright and former Czech president Václav Havel. “It is as if something were crumbling, decaying, and exhausting itself—while something else, still […]

Part 1             When I was five years old my father took an overdose of sleeping pills and was committed to Camarillo State Mental Hospital. I grew up with an insatiable desire to understand what happened to my father and terrified it would happen to me. I went to college, got married, had children, earned […]

Recent research shows that the divorce rate is at a 40-year low, unless you are over fifty. “Younger married couples are less likely to split up, but ‘gray’ divorces among older couples are on the rise,” according to Jo Craven McGinty, a columnist for The Wall Street Journal. According to the Pew Research Center, the […]

Old stereotypes would have us believe that women are more focused on relationships than men, but I have found that is not true, though men and women do see marriage through different lenses. A loving, intimate, and joyful marriage is just as important to men as it is to women. It is also just as […]

As the U.S. election nears and the Coronavirus continues to infect more than 50,000 Americans a day, the one question we must ask ourselves is this: Which man will truly protect and serve us? When faced with complex social problems that are difficult to understand and solve, it’s human nature to cling to our group. […]

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